Christmas Eve Fun

Argh I deleted the Christmas Eve video by mistake so I've had to shove it in here - sorry! Don't miss the newer post below!!

A Boxing Day Treat

Well, the one and only sort-of sightseeing we managed to do in Singapore was the obligatory visit to the legendary Raffles Hotel. We jumped in a taxi outside our hotel (in itself a treat - we usually had to be content with the shuttle bus) and were whisked off through the pouring rain to the very glamorous and historic hotel. It looked very luxurious, from the quick glimpse I got through the front doors. We were pointed around to the side of the building with the other non-millionaires to the famous Raffles Long Bar, a bar straight out of The Great Gatsby where the Singapore Sling cocktail was invented. Andy braved the sickly sweet Sling while I stuck to my tried-and-tested Bloody Mary. After two drinks it suddenly seemed like a good idea to stay for dinner. The steakhouse attached to the long bar has itself an illustrious history, for which the diner pays around 4 times the normal price for a very good steak. Lubricated by a couple of glasses of wine however, we didn't care about the cost, and managed to have a very lovely evening out.

Christmas Eve Fun

Here's a short clip of the fun to be had on Emerald Hill, Singapore at about 11.30pm on Christmas Eve...

Merry You-Know-What

Well its that time folks, so Merry Christmas to all out there from us in soggy Singapore!
Rach and I flew back to the peninsular from Borneo, landing at 2am on Xmas eve. We stayed the night in Johor Bahru and then made our way the next morning from Johor Bahru across the straits and into little Singers. After slogging up the chic Orchard Rd past all the boutiques in our minging travel apparel (not many guests seem to arrive as we did - carrying our filthy luggage through the rain from the MRT station...), we checked into the luxury Shangri-La hotel where they did their best to hide us from the other guests and shoved us into what is to be our lovely boudoir for the next 4 days.
We immediately made ourselves at home, ate all the free stuff, did our washing in the bidet and hung a line on the balcony... nice!
It's firmly wet season here in Singers - it's barely stopped raining since we arrived, giving us the perfect excuse to stay in the hotel or shopping malls...
We worked hard to get a little more used to the comforts of the Western lifestyle and spent Xmas eve in a few local pubs, supping a few Guinness and enjoying the Singaporean approach to the event; more like our New Year's Eve, counting down to midnight and then emptying thousands of aerosols of Chinese-made silly string and fake snow onto each other, us and themselves. Odd, we know. The streets were literally covered in empty cans; not what you expect of control-freaky Singaporeans, and not the sort of Christmas present the ozone layer wants, either.

Christmas day was a lazy hotel affair. We started the day as we meant to go on - in unsurpassed luxury with an enormous beakfast in bed, complete with fluffy robes and Santa hats. Thanks to Mother Bochenski we had a "proper" start to the day with a large box full of wrapped presents for us both. Andy got his blue Christmas shirt, as seen in the photo, I got a couple of fab bikinis and the obligatory (and very welcome) Christmas pants, socks and choccies. Once we'd let all that go down I road tested my new bikini in the hotel pool. We swam for an hour and hopped in and out of the jacuzzi, then as rained beckoned we retired to the grand lobby area for a cuppa. We changed and primped ourselves as best we could for drinks at 5pm and then dinner. This meant that basically we looked smart (I don't think we stuck out in the crowd...) but nothing matched, although I think in the circumstances we did very well. The Christmas dinner was a buffet - let the eating commence!! We started with the world's biggest plate of sushi and then shellfish, including our first taste of lobster. Then on to the traditional turkey and cranberry sauce. To finish off, our favourite treat of a huge cheese plate with a glass of red to wash it down and a chocolate fountain. Then in a final concession to the cheapy backpackers we really are we stole (well, borrowed) two large mugs for a cup of tea in the comfort of our room, in front of "Batman Begins" on the telly...

Thanks to those who sent cards and pressies. Pictured is me in my combat pants and new shirt, Rach in her Hong Kong birthday pressie dress and Christmas necklace.

Its Raining!

Just thought I'd treat you to this particularly attractive picture of me, taken on the canopy walkway at Poring Hot Springs, near Kota Kinabalu. We were going to write a post but the day trip was a washout (pun intended) and included such highlights as:

1) Forgetting the rain coats

2) Forgetting the mossie repellent

3) Wearing incorrect shoes

And the list goes on... So instead we are wiping today from our memories.

Scuba Diving on Sipadan

We're now down on the farthest eastern tip of Borneo, at one of the world's best dive sites, Sipadan island. The island is surrounded by a circle of coral reef which plunges down in a 600m deep wall to the sea floor. Since a group of tourists were kidnapped and killed by Indonesian terrorists in April 2000 the island resort has been closed and instead there is a Malay military base there. There are many bases in the area as piracy in these seas is rife. So we are staying on the mainland, in a sleepy town called Semporna, from where the dive boats leave for the various sites.
The wall dive on Sipadan is the must-do dive in the area so yesterday we set out to tackle it, with not a little trepidation on my part. The sea around the tropical island was completely calm as we got kitted up and backwards rolled into the water from the boat. The first dive was quite deep, beginning at 30m. To our left the reef was quiet and dark, to our right the dark blue sea stretched into nothingness and below us, the inky depths... As we came shallower the reef became more colourful. We saw more turtles than we could count, some coming right up to us for a good look, others relaxing on a sandy ledge on the reef - at times we could count 4 or 5 turtles in our sights. We also saw 2 white tipped reef sharks and many hundreds of fish of all sizes, colours and patterns. Andy had a bit of trouble with his ears (and is still annoyingly saying "what?" every few minutes) but we both had a fun dive. We rested on the boat and waited for the nitrogen levels in our blood to drop so that we could go down on the second dive. This one was a bit shallower so it was more relaxing. As we reached the southern point of the reef the currents picked up, and instead of fighting them we turned around and simply drifted back along the reef wall. It was so relaxing and very "zen". I actually had neutral buoyancy for once so instead of fiddling with my BCD the whole time I could drift along, and was particularly good at spotting the turtles and sharks.
After lunch on the beach on Sipadan, watched by the incongrously dressed military types (I could see why they might have to wear their boots, after all soldiers in flip-flops don't look very professional, but black woolly hats??? It was 35 degrees...) we got back on the boat where the rest of our group had another dive, Andy sunbathed and nursed his sore ear and I went snorkelling. Even the snorkelling was excellent, like being in a giant aquarium. It was marred only by the boat, which kept moving meaning I had to swim like billy-o braving big old waves and potential sharks to get back to safety.
I had a real feeling of achievement at our two dives - I seem to be conquering my initial panic when I enter the water (oddly enough I hate bobbing on the surface but am fine at 40m) and we saw absolutely loads, especially turtles and sharks. No hammerheads though, but it didn't take away from a really good day's diving.
Next stop is Kota Kinabalu, right across the other side of Sabah, necessitating a night bus tonight. I can't decide whether I am hoping we can climb Mount Kinabalu or not...

Kids on the jetty on Mabul Island. Andy had a dance-off with them.

Hawksbill Turtle

White Tipped Reef Shark

Bumper Headed Parrot Fish

Parrot Fish

The Biggest Nose in Borneo (No, Not Mine!)

Fuelled with verve for the outdoors and wildlifey stuff, we jumped off the jetty from the turtle islands and made our way to the offices of Uncle Tan's Wildlife Tours, to dabble in a river safari and spend a little time in the jungle.
With mile upon mile of palm tree plantation where once was forest, the remnants of the primary rain forest and jungle that once covered Borneo is now a few protected pockets and a thin strip along the Kinabatangan River in the centre of the island, and it was here that we forayed to brave snakes, mossies and crocs for a glimpse of the proboscis monkey. The brochure said it wasn't luxury, and it certainly wasn't the Shera-Tan; in break back from the river, all on raised walkway the camp had a communal living and eating area and biological loos with some muddy-looking water taps if your really needed a wash. The rooms were on stilts and caged off to protect us from monkeys, though we all felt like we were living in a human zoo, furnished with a mattress on the floor and a mossie net. Roll on Xmas and the Shangri-La!
Electing to stay one night instead of 2, Rach and I missed the jungle walks and (importantly) the spiders so for us the tour consisted of 3 river safaris; morning, afternoon and night. Our first tour was sponsored by Carlsberg, where our guide pulled up the boat every minute to point out something new; a wild orang, proboscis monkeys and macaques by the treeful, kingfishers and hornbills, crocodiles large and small; at one point we were all frozen with the dilemma of filming the monitor lizard on the bank, the croc in the water or the hornbill in the tree above them! As fickle humans this made us greedy of course, and after that we would only be content with a Sumatran rhino playing the trumpet with a croc, with an orang on its back conducting...
After supper, we all trooped to the boats for the night tour where the strategy changed; strong searchlights sought out the poor sleeping critters and we roared over to every pair of reflected eyes to see a couple of python, more crocs and innumerable helpless kingfisher, proboscis and macaque as they sat on their perches trying to get some kip; surprising they don't move houses really!
After a sweaty night with the cacophony of the jungle around us and hundreds of nocturnal visitors (but no mossies thank God) we tried for more with a dawn safari, but the animals got their revenge for a disturbed night; not a single monkey to be seen and, despite my Steve Irwin impressions, none of the crocs would hang around to be photoed and lectured about "Conservation, mate".
Feeling a little disconsolate, I was huffed that we would be missing out by leaving the tour early, but someone must have been listening. Just as we were putting our bags on to leave, one of the guides spotted an orang right behind the camp! A live, wild, mature male orang with a splendid ginger beard! We dashed to see him and spent some 30 minutes filming him as he hung, watched us, made his noises, got angry, peed on us, shook the trees, threw a log at me and a dead branch at Rach before swinging back into the trees. As the man would say, "What a beauty!"

Well, enough of this "goin bush". It's off to the coast again for some supposedly excellent diving. Let's be quite clear though; less than a hammerhead shark just won't cut it!

Turtle Island

We've just got back from another whistle stop tour, this time of Pulau Selingaan, otherwide known as Turtle Island. Its a beautiful tropical island just off the coast of Sandakan and was set up in 1966 as a conservation project for Hawksbill and Green turtles. We spent the afternoon paddling in the sea (although it was lovely and crystal clear it was only waist high at the maximum depth!) and sunbathing, waiting for that evening when the turtles were to come up the beach under cover of night to lay their eggs. As dinner came to a close around 7.30pm the group of about 20 people gathered together to wait for the turtles to arrive. By 9.30 we were worrying that our US$150 was going to go straight down the drain - a panicky thought when it's a month's budget blown on a one night "once-in-a-lifetime experience". By 10pm 4 people had given up and gone to bed, and typically, at 10.10pm the shout went up "turtle time!". >The two Australian girls who had gone to bed were up in a flash and on the beach, however the other older English couple were too slow and missed the whole thing!! Not happy campers.... We hurried to the beach where the large (1m wide) Green turtle was already in its nesting hole and was just starting to lay its eggs. Our photos may be a little dark as flash photography wasn't allowed - puts the turtles off the job, unsurprisingly. However we could clearly see the eggs being laid and were within inches of the turtle. It laid 64 eggs in total which were removed by one of the rangers, to be transplanted to the hatchery, then as the turtle moved off we left it to its long journey back down the beach. We then retired to the hatchery where the eggs were reburied in a sand hole and marked, so that they could be monitored and protected from predators. Our last job of the night was to release about 30 5 day old hatchlings back into the water.
They raced into the sea and it was quite something to watch their first foray into the big wide world. One hatchling was spotted earlier having escaped from the hatchery, heading for the jungle where the enormour monitor lizard dwelt. They like nothing better than gobbling baby turtles. There followed some discussion on the merits of rescuing the hatchling or letting Mother Nature and natural selection do their work, as the poor little thing was obviously a bit thick.
So, after a tense night of waiting we had finally seen what we came to see - truly an amazing and a one-off experience. Worth a month's budget? The jury is still out....

Richard in Lapland

Here's one for the ladies... this is my brother Richard on his Christmas trip to Lapland, looking like a handsome devil in his new hat. The trip was a success, by all accounts, and legal proceedings are only being brought against one person (rubbish rep) for being disability-ignorant. A record, methinks!

Wild Men of Borneo

Well, we supposed we had better actually get on with the trip after the highlight of business class (though they do say it's about the journey not the destination) and so we resigned ourselves to seeing something of Kuala Lumpur before heading for the island of Borneo and all its wildness...
Suffice to say KL was a damp squib. At one point, this was literally true. After bee-lining to the Petronas towers, tallest in the world you know, we arrived too late for the ticket handout and had to content ourselves with window shopping, a boozy lunch and gibbering in an air-con cinema through the new Bond film (for those who haven't, do see it; great action, cheesy lines and a bit of Craig for the ladies).
Still retaining a vague desire to get up some building, any building, we got drenched in a monsoon downpour on the way to the telecom tower and so gave up on the city, making our way instead to the island of Borneo and the Orangs.
Thus began the great Dollar Bill Burning of Borneo, an island full of wildlife and determined to make a living out of it...and us. The place has a vague East African feel to it, and amid the boiling humidity we dashed immediately to the east of the island and Sepilok Orangutan Rehabilitation Centre, slathered on some mossie repellent and set off to meet man's 3rd closest relative and the source of the human ginger hair gene...
Sepilok sits in one of the last areas of virgin rainforest, and most orangs are brought to the centre as orphans, quarantined, taught how to climb and nest and then gradually released into the wild. Initially, they return to feeding stations for diet supplements, though most eventually become fully independent. Rach and I stayed next to the centre overnight and visited during 3 feeding times, accompanied sadly by the rest of humanity which displayed less decorum and intelligence than their endangered cousins. Each time between 2 and 6 orangs came to get stuck into some milk and bananas, having a good old swing on the ropes that lead to the feeding station. As solitary creatures, they don't normally stay too long and there was always a troop of macaques on hand to clear up the food, scare the tourists and try and steal your sunglasses as you concentrated on filming the apes. It was a truly rewarding experience, the orangs were totally lovable and it was freaky to see the resemblance to some of our red-headed friends, solving one of evolution's mysteries...
Back in Sandakan, we have spent a day in post-colonial bliss relaxing in an English Tea house complete with Earl Grey and croquet, before we head off to see some turtles, a trip into the rain forest for my cousins the proboscis monkeys, and some diving...Let the cash-hemorrhaging continue!

A little bit of what you like...

On arrival at Hong Kong airport, after a very early start and a very late flight into Bangkok the evening before, we were pulled to one side as we disembarked by a lady with our two names on a very smart looking Cathay Pacific board. Just as we were wondering if Interpol had finally caught up with us, she surprised us with a free upgrade to business class for our flight from Hong Kong to Kuala Lumpur. I think it is no exaggeration (and actually a completely accurate fact) to say that we jumped for joy, gleefully discarding our crummy economy boarding passes for the sparkly new posh ones. We thanked the lovely lady over and over again before skipping off to the delights of 3 hours browsing in Hermes, Tiffany and Chanel (we were getting into character) at HK International.
When the flight started boarding we arrived at the gate to find a queue of about 250 people already stretching back to the concourse. We self-importantly joined the queue of 2 people at the business class desk when a guy from the long queue spotted us and thought "aha! they're dressed like tramps so that must mean we can all push in at that queue". I thought at that point that I had lost my passport (duh!) so I missed all this whilst rummaging desperately in my security belt, but Andy got the satisfaction of seeing Mr Queue Jumper unceremoniously pushed back into the plebs queue whilst we marched on board (I'd found my passport in my pocket) to be greeted by a seat big enough to fit the flabbiest American and a glass of champers. Bliss! The stewardess even knew our names five minutes into the flight (I'm sure that's not just because we kept asking for top-ups) and we were soothed with hot towels, wine, proper nuts with our drinks, a proper three course meal with you own salt and pepper cellars (!!!), a tablecloth (!!!) and a choice of four wines (!!!), Haagen Dazs ice cream and a praline with coffee. It was luxury and we enjoyed every minute!!!
Andy and I eating Thai Green Curry in our hotel room near Bangkok Airport at about 1am.

Hanoi and Halong Bay

We finally arrived at our last destination in Vietnam, Hanoi, first thing on Saturday morning after an AWFUL overnight bus trip. Through our own idiocy we ended up with the two worst seats on the bus and didn't get a wink of sleep all night. This meant that we were badly in need of TLC when we got here and spent all of Saturday lazing around eating pizza. On Sunday we had fun exploring Hanoi by walking miles around the Temple of Literature and Ho Chi Minh's mausoleum (he wasn't in as he was on his yearly holiday to Russia). Its lovely and cold here and perfect for walking around the city. We rounded off our excursion with hot chocolate and pastries at a french style cafe.
Yesterday we went on an organised two day tour of Halong Bay, which has lots of Unesco-protected limestone rock formations which poke out of the sea.They are actually the tips of a submerged mountain range. We took a boat trip all around the bay and did some kayaking as well. Our tour guide was completely useless and didn't know anything about the rocks. He took us to an enormous cave which was really beautiful but told us nothing at all about it, just pointed his red light at random rocks and tried to convince us they looked like turtles/dragons/buddha. Our group was good fun and we had dinner and then slept on the boat last night - it could have been a boozy night but as the guy in charge of drinks had only bought 5 bottles of wine between 15 of us that went out of the window. Today we sailed around randomly for the whole morning and then came back to Hanoi on the bus this afternoon. We were all pretty annoyed by the fact that the tour was really expensive, our guide had been rubbish and we'd not seen several of the sights which were listed in the itinerary. To add insult to injury, when we got back to our hotel (with whom we had taken the tour) they informed us that they had given our room to someone else and were now full. I'm sorry to say that this was the last straw for me and I caused rather a scene in reception, yelling and shouting at the receptionist until I was dragged away by Andy. I haven't been that angry for ages, and I totally saw the red mist. Anyway we're now in another hotel, not as nice but at least away from those two idiot men (and the building works which started without fail at 7 every morning). We are now trying to change our flights from Kuala Lumpur straight to Sabah (Borneo), from where we hope to bring you adventurous tales of orangutans, turtle sanctuaries, jungle trekking, leeches, diving and possibly even a climb up Mount Kinabalu. All simply in order to be able to eat as much as we can at Christmas dinner and not feel guilty...

DM-Zees and Demobbing

Let me see; it's my turn to blog, so that must mean it's time for more warry stuff, impersonal photos and National Geographic-type prose? Well if that's what you crazy kids want...
We've finally come as far up the country as the old demarcation between the communist north and the pro-western south; the Demilitarized Zone running along the line of the Ben Hai river. My determination to suffer a tour of the DMZ decided Rach on a day of HBO and adventures involving noodle soup .
First on the long day's itinerary was the Vinh Moc tunnel complex, once a system of 140 tunnels with trenches for entire villages to avoid the US bombing campaign and harbour the VC on their way down the Ho Chi Minh Trail. The tunnels have of course been widened for us lofty and portly westerners and in my group I was one of the shorter blokes, but even I came out wide-eyed, frothing and covered in sweat and clay after descending 23m below ground. I think one of the 2 gangly Finnish guys is still stuck down there...
My main interest in the trip was a look at the site of Khe Sahn Combat Base near the Laos border, famous for being besieged before the Tet offensive and the loss of "so many bright flowering young men", to quote Walter from the Big Lebowski. The base is a coffee plantation now and only a small museum shows where 6000 US troops were held down for 3 months in 1968, with the death of 200 US and 9000 NVA soldiers.

As a military man, I have found it strange visiting battlefield sites where our usual allies, US, Aussies, Kiwis and French, have note been on the winning side. This means that the usual graves, memorials and glorification of the "American War" are only seen from the North Vietnamese perspective, relegating the "West" to the anonymity of the loser.

Back in Hue and reunited with Rach, we donned our best crumpled clothes to celebrate my last day in Her Majesty's Britannic Forces with a slap up dinner at the tres smart (5-star) Imperial Hotel. We gorged on an all you can eat buffet and delicious red wine, returning around 7 times before relishing the best part, a cheese board, which was devoured with gusto. Mmm the pleasure of blue cheese on french bread washed down with a glass of red has been sorely missed.

A new life beckons, with only the occasional night lying awake pondering the future...